Interview: Natalie Taylor – Signs of Life
Natalie Taylor is the
author of the memoir, Signs of Life, in which she examines losing her
husband, Josh, at the age of twenty-four while five months pregnant with their
son, Kai.
She is deeply honest and
brave in this book, detailing her journey through grief, family dynamics, and
new motherhood. As a high school English teacher, Taylor enriches her own
writing with references and musings on authors whose words have touched her.
This book is a must read and I hope you will enjoy our wonderful interview:
Why did you want to share your story in a memoir and how were
you able to get this book published?
I wanted to share my story because one of my biggest
challenges in grieving was that I constantly felt like I was alone. I felt like I was the only 24 year-old widow
on the planet. That makes it hard because grief can make your brain to
all sorts of weird things and if you go through those things by yourself, you
start to think you’re crazy. But if you learn about other people who are
going through the same thing, you start to realize you’re just being
human. I so badly wanted other people to know that if they had talked to
thin air, stared at a calendar suddenly mystified by the concept of time
passing, or broken out into tears at the Home Depot check-out line, they were
not crazy.
I was able to get this book published because I am a very
lucky person. I gave it to my brother who is a screenwriter in L.A. and
he handed to these guys who handed it to this other guy and that guy handed it
to a book agent. She called me and a few months later, we found an
editor. Every step along the way I kept thinking, “if it only goes this
far, I’ll be happy because it means someone out there other than my mother really
believes in this book.” And then it just kept going until a box of
hardcover books showed up at my door one day with my name on them.
How did you balance writing, motherhood, and your career as an
English teacher?
This is a two-part answer. 1. For the first
two years of Kai’s life I was so incredibly scared to have any free time, I
worked until I was too tired to close my lap-top. After Kai fell asleep,
I could not handle the idea of walking out into a empty house and thinking,
“now what?” And really, I could only clean the kitchen so many
times. So I made a project and decided to write a book. As
exhausting as all of it was, it was better than watching television by myself.
As a writer, what is your schedule and process?
A lot of times I think of stuff when I drive or when I’m
in the shower, which may sound bizarre. But usually I think about
something until I really feel like if I don’t write it down, I’ll forget about
it. Sometimes I only have about 30 seconds to type an idea into the computer
before my son comes up to me with 16 questions about Egrets. But then
later when I have some time to myself, I go back and write for a while until
the thing that was in my head is on a screen where I can shape it and trim it
up the way I want to.
In terms of a schedule, I set a lot of deadlines for
myself or else I’d never get anything done. As an English teacher, I have
papers to grade every few weeks, so I typically write in waves and then when
papers come in, I dedicate all of my time to those and then eventually get back
to the writing.
What were the inspirations behind the cover images on the hardback and paperback versions of your book?
We wanted something that said, “This book has a sad
premise, but it’s going to be okay in the end.” It’s hard to convince
people to read a book when you say, “It’s about this pregnant woman whose husband
dies.” So we wanted a hopeful, uplifting image to help the reader
understand that it wasn’t a dark story, because it really isn’t. It’s
more about life than death.
Describe the response of your students when you became a
published author.
They asked the best questions. “Are you going to be
on Oprah?!” “Can we Google you?!” “Does this mean you are a
millionaire?!” Bless their heart for thinking an author could be a
millionaire. For the most part though, it was business as usual in room
270.
How has becoming a writer influenced your work as a high school
English teacher?
As an English teacher, I constantly say, “Authors make
choices.” Often times we get so wrapped up in the story we forget that
there is a puppeteer behind every character and that puppeteer is deciding
where the action goes. Sometimes that is tough to get across to students
that someone would spend so much time thinking about these small details in a
text. “What if Fitzgerald just felt like
making it rain! Why does there have to
be a reason!?” They always ask stuff
like that. But there is a reason! Now I can speak from experience that authors
really do make choices. Of course, I am not an author of literature, but
after going through the editing process with an editor, it made me realize how
every single detail really does speak to “the work as a whole,” as we say in
Lit class. But, at the same time, these
are teenagers and no matter how much experience I do or don’t have as an
author, I am still an adult to them, which means I have no idea what I am
talking about.
You were candidly honest in your book. What was the reaction of
the real life characters who were depicted in your story?
Incredibly supportive. That’s the long and the short
of it. I had numerous conversations with people as I was writing the book
to make sure I could include the events that I included, names, etc., and all I
got was love and support.
As a bibliophile, I felt a kindred spirit in your numerous
literary references. Can you share some of your most favorite authors and
titles?
This is a hard question!
Ranking my favorite books is like ranking my friends—they all bring
something wonderful and different into my life.
If I had to say, I absolutely love The
Color Purple. Right after Josh passed away I remember thinking, “no
one knows how I feel, no one has ever felt as bad as I have felt,” and then I thought
about Celie and her life is way worse than mine. But Walker is so good that by the end she gives
us hope. I also love The Grapes of
Wrath. I think ever American citizen should read it. I
sincerely believe Barack Obama should lead a book group on The Grapes of Wrath. (Or Maybe Michelle should do the book
group now that I think about it). But
the list is endless. Every time I read The Great Gatsby I think to myself, “How could one man think of
this all by himself.” I am reading One
Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest for the first time and I can’t put it
down. To me, reading classic literature is like watching the
Olympics. You just sit back and think,
“Wow. Look at what our species is
capable of.”
What is life like since readers last read the epilogue in Signs
of Life?
This is so hard to describe because the last time people
saw me, the sun was just rising for me, but I still had a long way to go. Now, life is amazing. Life after death has given me an appreciation
for living that I never had before. I just like to soak up the little
moments like walking Kai in to school, listening to him play with his toys,
watching him sound out letters. We spend
a lot of time with our family and friends.
They are still solid as a rock for us.
What are your current writing projects and do you hope to
publish another book?
I have a current project right now, but I’m going to keep
it quiet. But I can tell you that I feel
really good about it. Having a project
is fun and I definitely feel at my best when I have something cooking.
**Thank you to Emily Stinson for sharing this amazing book with this me- Jenny R.
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